To Love a Woman

After many years of wanting, I finally decided to give women a chance. Please don’t make me explain that this has absolutely nothing to do with my taste in men. That is another subject entirely.

Since I was with the same man for over a decade, I really don’t remember the whole dating game thing.

What I learned about women, the gay ones anyway, is that they can be more heartless and ruthless than any man. Yes, I’ve had my heartbroken. No, I’m not bitter. I’m just aware.

Women connect with each other on a very different level than men. When I meet one that I really like the connection is very emotional and extremely sexual. I lose points for this in the gay World I know. The truth is I am sexually attracted to both genders.

So my issue with women is one that I dont have with men. So, meet a woman, she’s beautiful and she loves the attention and the compliments she gets from me but in the back of her mind she is questioning everything I say. Trying to protect herself from getting “played.” In doing so I’m the one who ends up on the losing end.

With men, they may be slow to give you their heart but if they like you, they won’t dismiss you. Women, will give you their heart and not show you, just because they want the upper hand.

I personally don’t get it. Being that I am an extremely emotional person I have a problem keeping my feelings a secret. This does not equate to me falling in love easily. However, this does leave people feeling vulnerable when it comes to me. 

Maybe its that I have had more experience with men. I read them better, I assume they just want sex until they prove me wrong. Unfortunately my parents didn’t teach me how to deal with women.

I also find that my preference in the more masculine women may also be an issue. Some have complexes. Yes I prefer women that wear baggier clothes and don’t care about make up or their nails.

I also prefer women who know that they’re women and will let me treat them as such.

I used to be friends with this female in “transition” and I considered seriously what it would be like to date someone like that. Being with a woman is much, much more than just sex. I mean my family would never have to know that he used to be she.

These are issues that I have run into with these females. I call them complexes. I’m not judging. This is just what I found.

1. Overly dominant to the point of annoyance. I’m fine with submitting especially in the bedroom but sometimes its taken too far. If you’re threatened by me disagreeing with you, we have nothing to talk about. 

2. Major family issues. “My mom doesn’t like me” “she doesn’t like that I’m gay”
These women have mothers and/or fathers who don’t support them in their sexual preference. Ok mom you may not like the fact that your daughter enjoys anal sex but its no reason to treat them bad. Alienation from their family is something that I see very often to the point where I would prefer a female that gets along with her parents. 

2. Lack of ambition. I understand that you didn’t like school and your job sucks, so make a plan to change it. How many times do I have to suggest doing something with your life?

3. Lack of confidence. We are all insecure about something but most people understand that it is you as a whole that makes you beautiful, not specific features. I don’t want to argue with a female about how beautiful she is. 

4. Too much confidence. This chick thinks she can have whomever she wants and her standards are high… in physical appearance only. 

5. Crazy health issues. I’m not even going to elaborate on that one. I just don’t wanna be with someone who’s sick all the time.

6. They hate their vagina. Being a woman is amazing and it’s hard for me to understand a woman that doesn’t enjoy multiple orgasms. The clitoris is a wonderful place.

I’m still new to this so I’m not claiming to know everything. I just know what I’ve been through. It’s easy to fall in love with a woman, they appeal to every part of my being but loving them is not always easy.


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